Bucket List

Do you have things that you would like to accomplish before you die? Not general things, like "be a good person" or "live well"...but specific things that you would like to do before your time on earth is through?

Back when the movie A Walk To Remember was released, I made a list of things I want to do before I die. (Yes, yes...call me cheesey, but I felt inspired). Then, last year, the movie The Bucket List was released (which was actually the movie Chris and I went to see on our first date!), and I remembered my list. Surprisingly enough, I was able to find it, and I revamped it and added quite a few things to it.

All that to say, yesterday, I was able to cross off yet another thing on my list - see Switchfoot in concert. Switchfoot is my all-time favorite band, and they were playing at the Porter County Fair in Valporaiso. I went with Amber, my aunt, and my good friend Nick, and we had a blast - prime seats (which we didn't sit in once Switchfoot came on stage!), good times, and great music. Here are some of my favorite pictures from the night!

Jon Foreman = great musician. This is my favorite photo from the whole concert (above)!

He came down into the crowd...it was awesome.

Jerome! Pianist/keyboardist/guitar player extraordinaire!

Before the start of the show.

Great show!

Switchfoot + new t-shirt with lyrics from favorite song + great time with great people = ONE HAPPY KAYLA! :)

Disappointment. Yes, it has two "P"s.

Ever feel like you've disappointed someone? If not, I think you're lying...but that's besides the point.

The worst thing about disappointment is the horrible, gut-wrenching feeling it can leave you with. Some people would choose disappointment over frustration, sadness, or sheer anger. Not me. Disappointment kills me. Especially unspoken disappointment. You know, the kind where someone's really disappointed in you, but they just won't come out and say it. It just lingers between you in the air like a fog that's trying to suffocate you.

I will take pretty much any emotion over disappointment any day of the week. Yell at me. Scream at the top of your lungs. Curse at me. Any and all of the above mentioned (and even unmentioned) things are more preferable than the killer silence of disappointment.

But do you know what makes disappointment worse sometimes, though it may seem a bit contradictory? When you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the decision you made isn't one that disappointed God...just the other people in your life. Why is it that as humans, we're so attached to the emotions and reactions of others in our lives, even if we know that decisions we're making are God-honoring? That's a hard pill to swallow - especially if you're a people-pleaser.

But in all honesty, as hard as it is to know that you've disappointed the people you love, how much better is it to have made a decision that makes them unhappy than to make one that makes God unhappy? I think I'll choose the former any day of the week. Not to say that my record of decision-making is a good one, because I'd be lying to you if I claimed that as truth. But for once, I feel like I made the right decision - it's just going to take awhile to convince the people I love, and it's going to take a LOT for them to not convince me that I'm wrong.

"Sunshine, won't you be my mother
Sunshine, come and help me sing
My heart is darker than these oceans
My heart is frozen underneath

We are crooked souls trying to stay up straight,
Dry eyes in the pouring rain
The shadow proves the sunshine
The shadow proves the sunshine

Two scared little runaways
Hold fast to the break of daylight where
The shadow proves the sunshine

Oh Lord, why did you forsake me?
Oh Lord, don't be far away away
Storm clouds gathering beside me
Please Lord, don't look the other way

Crooked souls trying to stay up straight
Dry eyes in the pouring rain
The shadow proves the sunshine
The shadow proves the sunshine

Two scared little runaways
Hold fast to the break of daylight where
The shadow proves the sunshine
The shadow proves the sunshine"